The Summer of my Discontent

So several months into all the life changing experiences (new business, new church congregation, loss of a business partner/friend and loss of my mother) I began to question things.

Were the new church boundaries an inspired action? If so why are so many people and  families struggling with it. And why is the building we're assigned to attend 10 minutes further away. Our drive went from 35 minutes to 45. One Way! And one family's drive went from 20 minutes to nearly an HOUR!

My answer: It wasn't a God-inspired move, it was a man's convenience move. The members of the "new to me" congregation were in need of a spiritual transfusion and the "strong" members in my town were assigned as the inoculation.

First clue that the church is run as a bureaucracy. We're losing members over here, so let's take some from over there, reassign them and create a new congregation and call it growth!

Second clue was when ex-business partner was assigned as Women's President. Really? She's the best you got? That must be the only person they could wrangle in to say yes. Now I know that sounds mean and it is, but really. She wouldn't speak to me and she's the one who quit to take care of a goat! I had approached her a time or two to return requested items like recipes or favorite kitchen tools, etc. "Here's your recipe for white cake." I was received with a roll of the eyes and not a word passed her lips. Even a friend mentioned how odd the interaction was. Several weeks into this type behavior I spoke to my Bishop about how it might be resolved. All he could muster up was that his ex-wife and her new husband attend this congregation and they have found a way to make things work, so I could too. He said he'd have a talk with her and see if we could have a sit down with the three of us to work things through. That was a no-go. No way, Jose.

(Incidentally I also found out about this same time that there were child molesters/abusers attending that congregation with the victims of their crimes!! How could any parent allow their child to be subjected to sit each week in the same room as their attacker? And how can this church turn a blind eye to such things and call it part of the repentance process? Sick, sick, sick. Good thing I don't know names because, boy, does that rile me up!)

Sitting each week in sacrament meeting was getting harder and harder. You could call it The Summer of My Discontent. One particularly rough week I got up and left. I could not take a second more of it. I drove and drove and drove and ended up visiting a congregation I had attended several years before. When I walked in the foyer and saw my old friends I broke down in tears. It felt like returning home. I knew church could be a place of spiritual renewal. I had it once many years ago. I was determined to have it again. I resolved to attend that ward until my wounds were healed.

It was then I decided to separate the corporation and bureaucracy of the church from the doctrines of the church.  What are the official teachings and what are the folk tales? What is scriptural and what is man's interpretation? I attended church with a new resolve to straighten out the truth, the pure gems, from the crap. Because I was seeing a lot of crap.